But when we constantly compare ourselves to others, we waste precious energy focusing on other peoples’ lives rather than our own. Comparisons often result in resentment. Resentment towards others and towards ourselves. Comparisons deprive us of joy.

Considerable research also has examined the effects of downward social comparisons. They have been shown to increase positive affect, decrease negative affect, heighten optimism about the future, increase relationship satisfaction, and enhance self-esteem.

Social comparison theory was first proposed in 1954 by psychologist Leon Festinger and suggested that people have an innate drive to evaluate themselves, often in comparison to others. She may also compare her abilities to those of students who play other instruments as well.

By comparing ourselves to others we’re negating our own road and demanding that the past be different than what it was. The demands we place on ourselves to be like those we’re comparing ourselves may sometimes be motivations for change, however they are more likely to lead to feelings of diminished self-worth.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others. – Philippians 2:2-4 NIV. What is comparison but feeding our selfish ambition and conceit?

So how do we stop comparing ourselves?

1. The first step is to accept yourself, and accept your flaws.
2. Understand that nobody is perfect.
3. Focus on your life, and don’t spend any time or energy on the lives of others.
4. Be the bigger person.
5. Reacting is emotional, while responding is conscious.

Here are some tips I’ve found useful:

1. Awareness. Most often we do these social comparisons without realizing we’re doing it.
2. Stop yourself.
3. Count your blessings.
4. Focus on your strengths.
5. Be OK with imperfection.
6. Don’t knock others down.
7. Focus on the journey.
8. Learn to love enough.

Lead author Alex Jensen says that parents often compare the elder sibling to the second, in the belief that the first-born is smarter. “Parents also tend to think their daughters are more academically competent than their sons, and, at least in terms of grades, that seems to be true,” says Jensen.

Your parents compare you to others because they are competitive, extremely competitive. It is in their nature to want The Best, in every category, including children. Of course, you are angry.

7 things that life can be compared to and justify the comparison

• Life is like a book, The story is written and there are many difficulties which will be faced by a hero/heroine that is you.
• Life is like a pen.
• Life is like a cycle.
• Life is like a clay.
• Life is like a road with puddles all around.
• Life is like a game of snakes and ladders.

Deep Metaphors About Life and Meaning

• Bucket. The term bucket list comes from the saying “to kick the bucket” which means to die.
• Whisper. Sometimes life is like a whisper.
• Ocean. Life is also like the ocean.
• Storms. Storms are a part of life, just as they’re a natural part of every ecosystem.
• Hallway.
• Novel.
• Maze.
• Seed.