For Aristotle all friendship (philia) is rooted in self-love (philautia). The right kind of self-love is an achievement, love for what is best in us, motivated by self-love. Aristotelian friendship is unlike altruism in that there is no sacrifice of the self to others.

According to Aristotle, happiness consists in achieving, through the course of a whole lifetime, all the goods — health, wealth, knowledge, friends, etc. — that lead to the perfection of human nature and to the enrichment of human life. This requires us to make choices, some of which may be very difficult.

Self-love, Aristotle tells us, is derived from one’s love of the good; it is only insofar as one sees one’s activity and one’s life as a whole as something kalon and good in itself that one can exhibit self-love.

Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others. Self-love can mean something different for each person because we all have many different ways to take care of ourselves.

Love for oneself or self-love according to Aristotle This philosopher believes that the real facts contradict theories on selfishness. If indeed it is true that loving one’s best friend is virtuous, he also finds that we ourselves are the best friends we can have.

The 13 Essential Friendship Traits

• I am trustworthy.
• I am honest with others.
• I am generally very dependable.
• I am loyal to the people I care about.
• I am easily able to trust others.
• I experience and express empathy for others.
• I am able to be non-judgmental.
• I am a good listener.

A true friend is not only honest about themselves, but they are also honest about you. They are able to have difficult conversations in telling you things that sometimes you may not be eager to hear. The key is that they do it in love and with grace.