The Gift Amount Aim for the engagement party gift to be around one-quarter to one-third the cost of the wedding gift.

If the marriage doesn’t take place the gift should therefore be returned. Unless some form of agreement has been made prior to the proposal, which can obviously be seen as very unromantic and takes away the element of surprise, legally the recipient is under no obligation to return the ring.

Laws vary by state, and many say that since it was a gift, you can technically keep it. But can and should are two different things. “Ethics trump law in this situation,” says Post. If you broke off the engagement or if the decision was mutual, it’s best to return it, especially if it’s a family heirloom.

There’s no need to return your gifts. Typically, gifts are only returned if the wedding is canceled because the couple is no longer together. Since your intent is to host the wedding at a later date, you don’t have to return gifts you’ve already received.

Whether it’s a 30th birthday or a wedding, if you’re invited to a celebratory party, it’s customary for a guest to bring a gift. But if you don’t bring one, you aren’t breaking any laws. More than likely, you won’t be called out for your social faux pas, but it will probably be noticed.

If you can’t attend an event, do you have to send a gift? For pre-wedding events you can’t attend, you aren’t required to send a gift. You may opt to send a card instead, mentioning that you’re looking forward to seeing the couple and celebrating their marriage during the wedding weekend, but even this isn’t required.

We recommend spending around $50 on a gift if you’re not attending the wedding, though you should spend a bit more if you’re a close friend or relative of the couple.

Unlike a wedding invitation, receiving an invitation to a bridal shower does not mean you have to send a gift even if you can’t attend. “It’s not obligatory to buy a gift if you can’t attend the shower, but it’s a nice gesture if you are close to the bride,” says Gottsman.

Generally, a distant relative or an acquaintance gives somewhere around $100 to $125 per person as a wedding gift. Since the average amount of money that is given as a wedding gift is $150, those who are close to the couple might give more.

The average wedding gift amount 2021 guests spent on gifts was about $151, but there is a spike currently. This is owing to the many pre-wedding festivities, associated expenses, and a long list of wedding gift ideas.

Couples aren’t the only ones overspending on weddings. Parents of the bride and groom collectively contribute about $19,000 to the wedding, or about two-thirds of the total cost, according to WeddingWire. The bride’s parents give an average $12,000, and the groom’s, $7,000.