How can I get my child to stop whining?

Here are 10 things to say instead of stop crying:

• It’s OK if you’re sad.
• I know this is hard.
• I am here for you if you need me.
• Tell me what is making you feel sad.
• I see you and I hear you.
• I am listening to you.

As soon as the whining stops, provide your child with positive attention. Praise your child by saying something such as, “I like the way you are playing quietly right now!” Give lots of positive attention to the good behavior and it will encourage your child to seek attention in positive ways.

Babies may develop a whiny type of cry as early as 10 months, but full-blown whining doesn’t pick up until they learn to speak, Dr. Sokol-Chang said. Though whining typically peaks in toddlerhood and decreases with age, “I’m not sure it really goes away,” she said, pointing out that adults even whine to their partners.

Sometimes kids whine because they can’t quite express their feelings, so help your grade-schooler identify them when you can. Be sure to carve out regular time to read together, play a game, or just talk — without your child having to complain first. Thank him when he remembers to ask nicely, too.

1. Help your child find a voice. Make it clear that he must use his regular voice, not a whiny voice, to tell you things.
2. Be polite.
3. Encourage your child to say it in full.
4. Write it down.
5. Avoid edicts, and find solutions.

1. 7 Powerful Ways to Respond When Your Child Complains. By Rebecca Louick.
2. Define it. Kids may not understand what complaining or whining even is.
3. Listen and Validate.
4. Give a Choice.
5. Rephrase and Reframe.
6. Set Limits.
7. Respond Playfully.
8. Find the Good.

STOP the Whining!

1. Point out to children that they are whining.
2. Never give children what they want when they are whining.
3. The best way to respond when children are whining is to say you don’t understand them.
4. Silence is golden.
5. Don’t model whining.
6. Reward appropriate language.
7. Distract or redirect.
8. Use Time-Out.

During this year your child really starts to understand that her body, mind and emotions are her own. She knows the difference between feeling happy, sad, afraid or angry. Your child also shows fear of imaginary things, cares about how others act and shows affection for familiar people.

6 Tips to Help your Negative Child

1. Stop complaining yourself. Often children who think negatively have parents who think negatively.
2. Help your child change the filter.
3. Develop an attitude of gratitude.
4. ‘Reality checking’ thoughts.
5. Empathise and help them understand their emotions.
6. Help them solve their own problems.

Kids may whine because they need more connection or positivity. Psychologist Becky Bailey argues that sometimes whining is a signal that a child needs more connection. John Gottman’s research indicates that kids may also need parents to “turn toward” them more often when they express a “bid” for emotional connection.